The double red line

Everything in my life right now is linked to Yoga. Even this blog post. Not sure if this is true, but Gandhi is said to have mentioned that on a normal day you do your yoga and on a busy day you do it twice, or some such thing. Even if he had not said that, it makes sense!

The last week was a good one, because I did not fall sick. Nothing incubated inside of me after that Asia trip and ravaged me a few days later. The week felt like it had 10 days though. Sometimes you just get into that mode of improving your batting average at work and the more you focus on it, the more balls seem to come your way! It was that kind of week. On Friday, my voice started to crack. That is always an early warning sign for the impending aliens to put me back in bed. One thing leads to another and I am thinking.. "Hmm, I am behind on my yoga attendance and this may be the day to do two classes back to back". 

This is not the first time I am going to a yoga class twice in a day (did 4 over a 24 hour period two years ago with a good nights sleep thrown in) or doing two classes back to back. Usually, I look at the schedule and make sure it is not the "tough love" teachers in both the classes to pace myself and take a breath here and there when we get to the "I am definitely going to die on this mat today" part of class.

The first class was taught by a teacher who is from the "tough love" school. Her default is to kick my ass in class. Just at the exact moment, my head is filled with "best standing bow EVER!" she will go "Sundar, kick harder! you are not kicking hard enough" and I will be screaming inside my head going "that wasn't enough? that is all I got lady! Any more kicking and my head is going to spontaneously combust and you will have to scrape my smoking remains off the mat!". I would get the same feeling from when I was at the toll booth on 680, trying to collect every last quarter, nickel and penny in the car to make the 5$ toll, or risk a 27$ fine only to find that I am 17 cents short!  

All said, made it through the first class! After a quick internal debate with myself on the sanity of going back into the hot room, the side that said "why not? It cannot get any worse!" won. Drank a packet of Vitamins (and the 5g of sugar and electrolytes in it) and went back in. Took a nice 10 minute nap and before I could finish an evening dream of doing a better standing bow, the bell rang and the next class started. 

This time, I did not check the schedule to see who was teaching the two classes. Even if I HAD seen the schedule, it would not have made a difference. The next teacher who showed up, had taught me maybe twice before. Both those classes were overflowing with people and she didn't give me any corrections. This time was different. She knew it was my second class in a row...

If you have watched enough National Geographic videos, you will know that a lioness knows which gazelle is most likely to end up dead at the end of the short video clip, even before she takes the first step towards the watering hole. I was that Gazelle! Okay, that was stretching it a bit far. If you got visions of me gracefully moving through the savanah, let me stop you right there! The comparison is purely for the "dying at the end fo the clip" part. There was no grace, no strength or any sign of a fight left in me, or so I thought. It is one thing for the lioness to know which Gazelle.. but I wonder how the cameraman knows which one. He seems to pick it out with as much accuracy as the lioness.. and if a lioness and a cameraman know..why are the gazelles not able to know as well?!  Where were we? Too much Planet Earth in my head right now. Getting back to the topic...

On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 is like infinity and 1 is next to nothing, my strength was a 5 and flexibilty was a 3 during the first class. At the end of that class, my strength was a 2 and flexibility was  5! You become suddenly aware that bending comes easy and holding the bend is incredibly hard. 15 minutes into the second class, we are doing the first back bend and the teacher goes "you are already relaxed Sundar. Go for it.. bend!" and I went back in one smooth motion and didn't stop. Almost fell backwards after I could see the baseboard on the back wall! That is as far back as I have ever "back bended" standing up all these years.

Then I promptly panicked. The realization that there was not enough strength to get that heavy head and upper body back up hit me. Tried to come out of the posture immediately and there was a rush of blood from somewhere to somewhere.. and the next thing I know, was sitting down on the mat. For a few moments, everything was white and the teachers voice could not be heard. She was saying something to me but my ears shut down. There were an uncountable number of Jedi warriors fighting in my forehead with light sabres.. or was it an uncountable number of people using vacuum cleaners?!  Maybe it was Jedi warriers with vacuum cleaners?! It was hard to tell.

For reasons unknown to me or anyone else in the Universe (except probably my wife), I got back up and kept going. At some point the teacher mentioned she was picking on me to make sure I didn't go into "auto pilot" mode. Translation: "Not going to let you make it easy on yourself. It is my job to make sure you push yourself past that point". Went along with it and did my best ever, on a lot of poses in that class. There was some cramping, but came out of that as well and finished it still breathing. To an average Nat Geo cameraman, it might not have been very impressive, but I came out of that class alive and well!

After class we are having a chat and the teacher goes "I was going to pick on my fiance who was in the class. Didn't pick on him enough. Was trying to make sure you don't take it easy on the 2nd class". I told her "you don't have to say anything to him, to pick on him. You just have to look at him!. When my wife looks at me, I know one of two things...

a. I forgot to do something or

b. I did something wrong in a way it was not supposed to be done

a look is enough!"

Everyone had a good laugh and I started driving back home...

Isn't life like Yoga?! In the almost 19 years of married life, there are the same emotions you go through on the mat that get repeated over longer time frames outside the yoga room. Everything from elation to disappointment, but only fleeting because you know it is all good in the end! and there is the red line..

When San gives me that look, I know that the first red line has been crossed! Something has been forgotten or done wrong. Now it is a question of seconds.. the clock is ticking. If the mistake can be identified within those precious few seconds, sanctions can be avoided and wars can be off the table. Problem is when you don't know that you have crossed the red line. 

This could happen when you have screwed up on multiple fronts and are trying to figure out which one got you that look from your wife. You forgot to wash the dishes.. no, you forgot to put the clothes in the dryer..no, she is at her laptop with that look.. you forgot to print and sign that damn thing at work and our printer at home is out of paper or toner or you were supposed to tell your boss something or you forgot to file your reimbursement or .. or.. or .. your head spins as you try to correct any and all mistakes within those few seconds.. kind of like you try to correct that standing bow with the teacher staring at you.. 

What have you done?! not lock that knee? not stretched that hand? not looking at the right place? not kicking hard enough? The teacher is still going "Sundar.. come on?" They won't tell you, what it is that you are not doing for an agonizing second or two!

(had some fun just now with Jr. recording me doing a standing bow that  I used to do almost 7 years ago, almost 3 years ago and close to present day.. right after munching a lot of carbs while watching Superbowl with friends)

That is when you cross the "double red line"!  Be it home or Yoga room.. that is the "don't make me come there and show you!" look which by now elicits a Pavlovian response from me :

1. Hang down head in shame

2. mutter something to myself

3. realize that I was definitely in the wrong, given my track record 

4. find out if there is any chance to undo the damage real fast

At home, chances of undoing damage fast are a hit or miss, but in the hot room... we do everything TWICE! Thank god for small favors. So I do get to show that what is being said has been understood and corrected in "take two"!

As I write this post, have crossed three red lines and one double red line already. But it shall pass. When you are surrounded by folks who have your back, life is good!

Dialogues with Yoga teachers

We have a new teacher at BYSJ who can only be described as "cross between a fire breathing dragon and a horse whisperer!"

In my third or fourth class with him, he jumps down from the teachers podium all concerned and in a flash he is standing next to me.

Fire breathing horse whispering dragon (lets abbeviate to Fire for short) : "Boss, something wrong with you?"

Me: blank stare that suggests "why would something be wrong with me? I am in the freaking first row busting my ass giving it a 110%" but I am unable to open my mouth and say anything because of the surprise factor.

Fire : "do you have a back injury or hip injury or something?"

Me : worried look on my face and thinking "do I have a back or hip injury that I am not aware of? maybe he knows something I don't.. these yoga teachers always seem to know more about my body and mind than I do myself" .. then I mutter a feeble "No"

Fire : Then why are you not kicking your leg out? I see you are never kicking your leg out. (His drill sergeant tone actually suggested "why the hell are you not kicking your leg out? what is wrong with you boy?") 

Me : (my head was going.. now come on.. "never" is a strong statement. you are saying never based on just one week of observation.. again all this is in my head) and I say out loud  "That is because I am not sure if I am locking my leg!

Fire : How long have you been standing like this?

Me : little over 4 years.

I was thinking the dude was actually going to be proud of me, for staying in stage 1 of standing head to knee pose for four years, patiently trying to lock my legs for all of 60 seconds, before graduating to stage 2. The next stage was to kick the leg out. After all, this is a life long practice and some folks apparently take months or years to lock their leg! Turns out, I was off on that logic, by a wide margin.

Fire : Your legs seem locked enough for me! Try it. I am going to stand here till you kick it forward a little bit. 

So he stayed next to me, literally pushed my hip to one side and pushed my knees back and breathed fire, till I kicked forward. 

Then he tells the class "If you keep doing the same thing to the same extent every day and come back and say, nothing is improving, you are not being fair to yourselves and the yoga. You have to take a chance and try the next step every now and then"

He brought out the bad bengal tiger in me.. I started getting flashbacks. 

There is a back story to my love hate relationship with this pose. There was a time, when I actually managed to do this pose.. nine months after starting to do Bikram Yoga. 

Guess I spoke too soon, while writing that post!  

In early 2012, every time I would kick out, my teachers would look at me and go "lock the knee.. your knee is not locked yet".. and they would all say it with concern in their voice like a parent tells a kid "dont touch the stove"! 

Somewhere, I became so unsure of my knee's "lockedness", if there is such a word, that I stopped at stage 1. It was okay in my head. After all, I was perfecting standing on one leg and distributing the weight evenly on one foot. It came in handy to occupy the kids and their friends in "who can stand on one foot the longest without bending the knee" contests. (note the profound lack of the word "locked"!)

It would be nice to have a lockometer strapped to the knee, that rings a bell and goes "Locking confirmed. Please proceed to stage 2"! Maybe I should come up with such a meter, because there is always the question in my head of "how locked is locked?" and Fire is not going to be there in every class for a confirmation.

The last few days have seen me go from stage 1 to stage 1 1/2 with some consistency. At this rate, I might even get to stage 2 and beyond very soon! 

At the end of the day, he was right. Every now and then the T-rex in me should test the fences. Who knows what might happen?

Worse case, you get a sequel to  "standing head to knee" post!

A side note: It is great to see teachers walk around and fix poses during the class.

In one class, Fire handed the microphone to another teacher in the room and was walking around fixing everyones pose. It was surreal to have that kind of attention in a class.

It is also funny, when a teacher comes to you and says "can I adjust your pose?" It is like they are asking permission to touch you, be it male or female teacher, asking a male or female student. See it happen so many times in class and I really don't get it.  

This is a physical class. It is like your doctor or physiotherapist asking for permission to touch you, before doing a treatment! If the teacher is not going to adjust your pose, who do you expect to adjust it? Shaquille O'Neil?

An interesting start to travels

It has been an interesting start to the travels of 2015!

First trip of the year.. boarded a plane to Asia. We all sat down and within a few seconds after buckling my seat belts, the lady behind me let out a loud sneeze that sent wind rushing through the gap between my seat and my neighbor. It was gusty enough to compete with the directed air flow from the nozzle thingy above our heads! 

Being the nice courteous dude, I said "Bless you!' and she mumbled a "Thanks!" A few minutes later she did the same thing and we went though the subroutine again that brought back memories of GOSUB and GOTO 10 from high school BASIC class.. 

By the time they made us watch the seat belt video and we were waiting in line to take off the GOTO 10 thingy had been executed more than 6 times at which point I was tempted to change the subroutine from "Bless you!" to "#u%k you!".  If she was that sick and sneezing away, why was she on a plane?! Doesn't she know that I have to deal with critical meetings, watch my food everytime for allergic things in carnivorous countries where even an order of plain rice comes with a few black sesame seeds as garnish! There are enough death traps that one has to watch out for, without having to deal with "flu or flu like symptoms". Does she not care?! 

After take off she fell asleep which was good. Soon the good folks at United cooled the plane down so much that we all went into Cryogenic freeze. I think United is learning too much from Star Trek and other Sci-Fi movies. Pretty soon we will be submerged in some blue fluid and put in capsules before take off. It is only a question of time and you heard it here first!  Their real idea is to probably force everyone (even those 6'4" viking looking guys whose thighs are as thick as my waistline) to sleep by dropping the plane temperature and that way they don't have to serve more folks those pesky drinks and snacks between meal services. 

Things went well till the hotel was reached and after a good nights sleep, woke up to find out... you guessed it.. "flu like symptoms". It was not that bad. A slightly runny nose, spitting some blood into the sink aka sore throat and the best part ? Come back and see blood on my pillow. Was trying to think.. "maybe I was drooling and this blood came from my mouth? or maybe my nose is bleeding because the hotel air is dry?" etc. Later found that the blood was from my ears! 

Three things went through my mind in a split second. In sequence they were:

1. I was in a foreign country

2. Have never had to go through healthcare options in said foreign country

3. Blood from ears invariably means some death sentence thanks to zillions of Sivaji and Kamal movies where blood dripping from various orifices in face is promptly followed by a bald doctor (same doctor in all those zillion movies) checking patient with just his stetoscope, rummaging from his medical bag for some other thing and promptly declaring "you have lymposarcoma of the ear/nose/throat and you have only a few months to live!"

Did a "cut cut cut" to the thought process and decided to ask my colleagues for help. One of them came up with some Amoxycililn (we will not go into the details here) which cost by the way the equivalent fo 4 USD for a box of 24 tablets.. except it was twice the dose. Given that 90% of my visits to the doctor over the last 20 years have ended with a prescription for Amoxycillin, decided it was a safe bet to start myself on yet another course in case the ears were infected.

Turned out it was a wise move! Things got better and all symptoms are gone. Now I have my hands on the US dose of Amoxycillin and some antibiotic ear drops and things are getting to feel normal.

They say "when it rains, it pours!". So while all this recovery was being attempted, my SVTC Jacket which has pretty much been like a school uniform for the last 8 years gave in. The zipper broke. Had to trash it and go jacket shopping.

It has been my observation that in East Asia, they have a lot more variety for outdoor winter jackets. The women have really pretty jackets in a multitude of colors and designs that walking through busy streets will be a photographers dream for catching some "color". Even the men seem to have a lot of options when it comes to jackets that actually fit them in various colors! 

Contrast that with Cupertino where the entire populations jacket supply comes from probably 4 sources.

a. Costco Jackets where the guy's position inside the oversized jacket is similar to an electron in a cloud. 

b. Target Jackets that make guys look like they are about to empty their bowels with one wrong sneeze thanks to the tightness in the chest and waist

c. The ubiquitous gray NorthFace fleece or 

d. A Columbia jacket that takes the puny desi or Chinese guy look like a polar bear cub

It is also important to remember that the average Cupertino resident is probably a desi or chinese dude who is 5'4" to 5'8" height and is a size "Medium". The only jackets that will be left on any local stores will be things with  3 or more "X's" in front of them. One would think that given the demographic the local stores would wisen up and stock more medium.. but no!

Where were we? Yes, Jacket shopping!

We went to a local market ten minutes from the hotel and there were a dozen jacket stores all reminding me of Burma bazaar in Madras in the late eighties (not sure if that place is still there!). Every small 8x10 store had sales people literally pulling us into the store. 

Then we went into a discussion of what is the best brand in this part of the world that is a "copy" of the Nike's of the western world?

My friends were obviously shocked by the US dude who wanted to go bargain shopping for local brands. Explained to them that most of my cloth shopping was done during India trips and the brand name shirt that I am wearing is purchased from a dude who is allowed to sell "rejects" from an export only unit that makes it in India for 8$ when the shirt costs 44$ in the US. They asked me what was the "reject" in the shirt and my response was "it failed a quality inspection from the US inspector. Instead of two spare buttons stitched on the inside bottom of the shirt, there was only one! The discussion turned to "quality" and we went back to more store hopping.

After watching me haggle with the local store keepers they said "Li-Ning" is  like the Nike here to which my counter was "then what is the New Balance here?" and the response was "361 degrees".

We found a nice jacket made by this wonderful company! 

This jacket will give all the above jackets in sections a through d, a run for their money. For that material, stitching quality, attention to detail and price point, it simply cannot be beat!

So from that stand point, this has been a good trip so far. The guys I work with are very thoughtful and understanding. They let me have enough rest between antibiotics to survive the week!

One more week to go in Jan and we will see if Feb turns out to be better!

With all this going on, my dream of finishing a 60 day Bikram Yoga challenge was pretty much dashed. So this year, I get to watch everyone else finish it and that is not an easy thing for me to do. Watching people put up their stars and cheering them on knowing I won't will be my yoga challenge for this year. 

One has to learn to let go, no?!

Taro, Pregnancy and learning- all in a days routine..

Think of two things you would not naturally connect, type them in the search box in this blog and there is probably a post about those two things.

What has Taro root got to do with Pregnancy and learning? Here is the story...

Earlier today we visited friends for lunch at their new place. There were lots of dishes, all safe items given they knew my allergy history. There was this one curry in particular that was extremely yummy. While I sat there figuring out if it was potato, plaintain or what.. she said "it is Taro.. what you call Seppan kazhangu".

I was baffled. Having had Taro all my life, especially as Taro roast, it was difficult to believe that what we were eating was actually Taro. It was crisp, had sharp outlines and the texture was as good as a potato roast. Okay, if you are not south Indian, you might be wondering what all the big fuss is about.. 

So we deviate for a little cooking lesson. Taro, is a root and when we get it from the market there is a lot of mud and dirt still on the root. My mother taught me (her mom probably taught her) that the right way to prepare Taro was to first wash the thing, put it in a pressure cooker with some salt and cook it, then remove the skin, wash again, then cut into little pieces and do the roasting with seasoning in slight oil (or if you are a roast fan like me, lot of oil). My MIL does it the same way as well! The real issue is that when you pressure cook it and remove the skin, usually the first few millimeters of the Taro is all mushy! My kids don't like to peel off the skin off boiled Taro unlike Potato because they think it is "slimy and Yukkie". 

So how did this girl, who is almost half my age, manage this miracle of sharp cut Taro pieces in a roast that was cooked yet not the slightest bit soggy? I said "Impossible! how did you manage it?" and they both say "we got tired of the slimy stuff.. so we decided to peel the Taro first, then cut it into nice pieces, then we slow cooked it in a covered pan for a long time.. much the same way we make potato roast!"

The simplicity of this approach was impresive. But have you seen Taro fresh from the Indian grocery store? Peeling it is the equivalent of giving the Yeti a haircut! you cannot even hold it in your hand right.. then there is all the mud, roots sticking out.. nevertheless, they managed it. So I have to try it now!

Humbled by this new learning and leaving their house as though we had just been to the Twilight zone, came home and quickly went to Yoga class. Our hosts and my ever supportive family were laughing when I said "have to go yoga this evening" because they were not sure how much Yoga a guy can do after eating 3 pounds of rice with two lbs of Taro and some nice dessert to top things off. 

Still, off I went with the idea that if things got too difficult, would take a kneel. That is when the second surprise hit me. The instructor for the class was pregnant. Not early pregrant.. Her due date is less than 2 weeks away and this was her last class before delivery. 

Trust me, there is nothing more scary than a very pregant woman on the podium shouting "stretch you hands to the right, your knees to the left, come down and push, Push, PUSH!" 

and there is nothing more embarassing than you looking equally pregnant with Taro, unable to execute the PUSH instruction! 

When you have an instructor who is so inspiring, you have no excuses for slacking off. So after that, did the rest of the class giving it my 120%. That room was hot and there were 5 newbies in there who needed to be watched and she taught with as much attention to detail as any other teacher. Truly amazing and inspiring! If you need a visual, here she is in a class as student in another class earlier this week.

So there you have it.. Taro, pregnancy and learning.. all in a days routine! 

On a funny note, a conversation with Jr. earlier today:

Jr.: Appa I am sweaty. It is so hot in our bedroom. Can you put the fan on?

Me : really? (Touch her forehead and neck). yes! you are sweaty.. you know what that means?

Jr.: (thinks for a second) and goes "Oh NO! you are going to make me come to regular yoga class with you?! it is going to be 90 degrees for 90 mintues!"

Me : yes and no. Yes, because you can sweat now and that means you can come to yoga class with me. No because it is not 90 degrees for 90 minutes.. it is 105 degrees for 90 mintues.. welcome to the torture chamber!

She is thinking of finding other excuses to bail on the promise.. We will see about that!