entertainment

"If little girls had Brains!" - How autocorrect is ruining inflight entertainment

On a recent United flight they played a Sandra Bullock Movie called The Heat.

There is a scene in this movie where the cop character played by Melissa McCarthy, is searching for the police chief's "balls". She is searching everywhere in the office and even annoucnes to the rest of the police force "has anyone seen the captains balls? they are small, tiny, the size of ball bearings? no.. they are the size of little girl balls, IF little girls do have balls!"

Or at least that is what I remember seeing in the trailer!

For some strange reason, United decides to play this movie in a flight that does not have personal TV screens. Why they would do that is beyond me as it is an R rated movie that is not appropriate for kids staring at the big screens, given all the language in the movie.

For a worse reason, they decide to "autocorrect" the dialogues in the movie.

I am not sure if this was United's doing or Fox pictures doing, but it was a bad call. They replaced words like shit with stuff, other four letter expletives with kids choice of abuses and the worst choice was to replace "balls" with "brains"! 

There I was half asleep, trying to fight my stomach convulsions trying to divert myself, put on headphones to see what the movie was about and the first dialogue I hear ? 

"they are the size of little girl brains.. if little girls had brains!" and it just pissed me off. Was thinking "why won't little girls have brains! My girls are smart. How insulting is that for any little girl who happens to be on this plane? what are they thinking?!" and then it came to me that the original script was not this. 

United seriously needs to rethink its movie choices and they need to stop this autochange feature. Given the new dialogue was in Melissa McCarthy's voice, I am surprised she would do a voiceover for a dialogue that needlessly ridicules girls!

A new home record..

The kids almost always beat me at a game of Ticket to ride. It has replaced sequence as the new popular game, thanks to the MIL who introduced it to us.

Today, Daddy answered back with a new home record score of 140 points by connecting three sides of the board... Yes! I went from Los Angeles to Miami via Vancouver and Montreal..

Just on a side note, Jr. made a 130 once and the little one made 135 once and they play like pro's.

Now that Daddy is on the same footing with the girls, the games are going to be interesting!

Barnum and Bailey

We made it to the circus today. My parents heard there was a circus in town and started going into deep nostalgic drives of the old Kamala three ring circus and how I could not stop talking about it for months after my first (and possibly only) childhood circus visit.

Have taken Jr. to the circus when she was very little and most of her memories of the circus were from reading the blog post.  Amazing what a blog post can do to jog a kids memory!

Looks like they have changed the show a lot. There was one man with six tigers before. Now it was one man with 3 tigers and 4 lions. The elephants did not do as many stunts as last time and didn't have to walk across pretty ladies.

Two new items which were really amazing were the Shaolin Kung Fu demonstration and the motorcycle dare devils. They fit 8 guys on bikes into this steel cage and it was simply superb. Have seen two guys inside the cage in the Indian circus (actually remember it). This one must be some kind of record.

The animals didn't do much and they are mostly captive born and trained and today we should be happy that Barnum at least brings elephants to big cities to show they are not "wild" creatures that are to be shot for trophies.

The protesters outside were shoving pamplets into my kids hands that said "stop going to circus, stop the cruelty" etc. they had gory pictures of dying elephants etc. This kind of upset me. No one gets to push such things to my kids. Was downright rude to one of the ladies.

This is soliciting in a way and don't understand why this is allowed. Millions of turkeys are grown in really horrible conditions in this country and slaughtered every year.

The three creatures that are supposed to be able to feel a human being accodring to old indian sages are cows, crows and snakes. They say these three creatures can sense the human vibration and a cow can actually shed a tear when it commiserates with a human.

Cows are in horrible conditions in the US. Not that they are slaughtered for food but the fact that most of them are cramped into a confined location for their entire lives and are fed things that are not normal and are not even slaughtered in a quick and relatively painless way.

It is impossible to show kids elephants, tigers or lions these days. You go to Chennai and you cannot find even the occasional temple elephants! Forget lions and tigers. Now who is responsible for this? Barnum and Bailey? Think not. These folks should go protest outside upscale chinese restaurants that serve tiger penis soup as a aphrodisiac or sell ivory products as art.

Yes! Elephants may be prodded to make them learn a few tricks. Do not know how extreme it is with this circus but the animals we saw today were all hale and healthy and looked like they were well taken care of. Same thing from last time where they were smiling as all ten of them walked past us in the back street. To me this is a better way to show kids that elephants and lions and tigers are valuable to us in some way!

My little one wants all bees dead because one little bee stung her! It took me months to teach her that without bees there will be no flowers and without flowers no fruits and vegetables and we will all starve to death pretty soon.

Same thing with spiders. Told her that we have lot of baby moths in the bathroom because she asked mommy to kill many spiders. Now the spiders are not eating the moths anymore because they are dead and instead of one spider there are ten moths!

Again, way too much digression from what started off as a post on a great show! It is still a great show. Maybe not the greatest show on earth.

That title has been conferred to the Disney pre fireworks Castle display in Orlando by the Traveling Narayanan's.