Guilt free reviewing

There is guilt free viewing and then there is guilt free reviewing!

While I felt that Kamal had gone overboard in Dasavatharam and was so upset that he could have made a much better movie with a lot less effort with the same material he had and promptly wrote a post at 2 in the morning just to vent, today has been a different day.

A post mortem, of sorts, on the movie, the initial reaction and some guilt on being too hard on Kamal.

My mother, holds me to a different standard than by brother or sister! She rarely agrees, but everyone knows. Call it the first child syndrome. I cannot get away with a lot of things that my brother or sister can get away with, even if I already set a precedent!

That said, there is three reasons for the guilt.

1. Did not mention what was good in as much detail as what was not. There are some great Kamal moments in the movie.
2. A higher expectation from Kamal because he is expected to pull this off without flaws.
3. The initial negative reaction has now given way to some reconciliation inside the head that "it was worth watching once!" . One can always point to the million things that could have been done differently to make it Oscar worthy (no pun intended), but what is done is done and that is what got presented to the audience!

The funny part is there are so many reviews out there that actually shower accolades on Kamal playing Fletcher or Bush! The two things that really irked me to no end because the makeup for these roles prevented him from showing any "acting"!

Then my MIL is talking to someone on the phone saying "the chinese Kamal".... and I was thinking "Hmm.. if you dont know the difference between Chinese and Japanese, and if you don't know that NaCl is salt, chances are you might appreciate the movie a lot more!"

In the movie Kamal says "I dont say god doesn't exist! Only say it would be great if he did!" and the irony is, I didn't say this movie is bad. Only said, it could have been a lot better!

Still, never thanked Kamal once in the previous post for :

a. Trying so hard
b. Getting us to sit there for 3 hours and make it feel like 2 hours and 40 minutes
c. Getting a lot of things right, the way only he can!

So, there.. Thank you!

Now Dr. Kamal Haasan, please go and make a Crazy Mohan dialogue based comedy before you make another mega movie! We know you are versatile enough to pull it off! Flawlessly!

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How to make a blockbuster -101

To date, this blogger has not made a movie. His entire videography experience is limited to movie maker clips under ten minutes!

As Confusius once said (he said a lot of things and I am not sure if this is one of those things) "Every ass has a hole!" and along those lines, I have a little primer for how to make a blockbuster movie, purely based on watching movies that went on to become blockbusters or bankbusters.

1. Do not go overboard - on anything. Be it makeup, stunts, dialogues, accents, length of the movie, anything!

2. Do not insult your audience - even if you are doing something that is not normal, make it look possible under the assumptions of the movie. In other words, don't violate the rules of your own movie.

3. Find your target audience - You cannot please every type of audience, even if you are a universal hero! Go right or go left!

4. Screen time - One person showing his face for 80% of the movie, even if the face is disguised brilliantly, severely, grotesquely, is still cloying! Give other people in the movie a chance to participate! It is a movie, not a one man stage show.

5. Movies are expected to have a coherent flowing storyline and relevant dialogues. While they are not a must, they do help. A movie is not just a showcasing of acting talent. If one is capable of multiple disguises, you could technically do 36 five minute skits with 36 different makeups and string it all together and call it a three hour...."talent show"!

Why do I suddenly have the urge to write all this? Well, just came back from watching Dasavatharam, the movie.. sorry.. the Kamal Hasan talent show!

I am upset that he did not play Hilary Clinton or Barak Obama!

Well, maybe in the sequel Beesavadharam, where he plays 20 roles in the same movie, he will consider those two characters!

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